the sky is the limit...

(the rooftop of the world: tibet 2010)

I feel like life just keeps twisting and turning, and the more I try to control things, the more I realize the less control I actually have. I know that God is directing the course of my life, and I feel His hand leading me and letting me know, “I am here. Don’t fear my daughter.”

2010 was a year of change, seeds being sown, and new experiences had. I feel like I was able to accomplish alot of personal goals this past year: getting accepted to graduate school, having some of my photos hosted at a small gallery, travelling around more of this country - specifically to Tibet, writing more music, and taking leaps of faith that brought me closer in my relationship with God. I am so thankful for the things He has done in my life.

I think turning twenty-eight brought with it some new perspectives as well – I make mistakes, and its ok. I’m not perfect – and its ok. I’m a traveler, an adventurer, a worshiper, a musician…and I love my life. For the first time, I feel like I’m able to truly feel confident in myself and embrace all that life has to teach me. I’ve stopped comparing myself to others to finally be leading my own life, on my very own terms.

Over the past few weeks, in various situations, I’ve kept hearing the phrase, “sometimes you have to cut down the tree in order to see fruit.” And, I feel like moving abroad has definitely produced fruit in my life. I could have never anticipated the places I’ve been too, the people I have met, the situations I’ve found myself in. All of it…has changed me.

2010 also brought with it some surprises. This past year I was originally planning to move back to Canada to work on my graduate degree in Adult Education full time. After one conversation with my advisor, she told me that I actually don’t need to be living close to campus. That was a shocker! Because the program is self-directed, there are no classes – I write my thesis and do my course work on my own, and I determine how long its going to take me. The more I learn about this program, the more I realize how perfect it is for me. For this reason, I’ve decided to keep living in China. I get butterflies whenever I think about this. It was a huge decision to make. I’m learning, though, its amazing how when we trust God, He makes our path straight. Or maybe we realize that our path was straight all along and we never had to worry.

The company I work for is being totally supportive of my further study as well. When I come back to Beijing in April, I can continue working 3 days a week organizing city wide life club events for students, and then work on my thesis on my days off. This opens up a lot of opportunities for research projects and thesis options for me! I think its going to be a huge learning curve in the beginning to figure out how I’m going to pace myself and shape this new phase of my life, but I’m treating all of this kind of like an experiment – one that I am uber excited about!

I know now that God has truly been taking care of me all along. How could I ever doubt or worry before? While I had my own plans, my own agenda, He just swept me up and said, “Look at your life. Look at what I want to show you. My ways are higher.” While I know there are going to be a lot of changes and adjustments this year, I feel so much peace about it.

A few weeks ago, a guy Kamal at church prayed over me, and he told me this is going to be a year of harvest in my life. If my plans for graduate school aren’t already crazy enough, I’m also thinking of recording more music as well. I know that I can’t do any of this on my own, but I can do anything through Him who strengthens me.

I hope this is an encouragement to anyone who reads it, and that you are reminded that God has a plan for each of us.